Life throwing that curve ball.
Well to say it has been a while is an understatement but I know as fellow Fibromyalgia sufferers, that you can appreciate this. Sometimes things happen, life get’s in the way and important stuff get’s pushed to one side and that has been the case with me these past few months.
At the end of July, I was involved in a car accident, I had been hit from behind at what has now been estimated about 30mph, relatively minor in the big scheme of things as I walked away and was able to drive my car to the garage. However, 4 months down the line and I am still signed off work and my car was ultimately written off.
Now here is the thing, to everybody on the outside looking in, I look fine and for sure I am not ill but I am struggling with extreme pain, added to the pain of my Fibromyalgia, I am now experiencing pain on top of pain.
My back and neck are injured, and it has transpired that the soft tissue damage is still showing on an MRI scan 3 months after the event. Thankfully though, there is no break in my neck which they initially thought could be a possibility. I succumbed to taking anti-inflammatories and painkillers but after several weeks of trying to get my prescription right to stop me feeling very sick, I gave up with them and now just get through the day the best I can.
Sadly, all of the coping mechanisms I have for my Fibromyalgia have fallen by the wayside at the moment; the yoga and gentle stretching is too painful, massage is just uncomfortable and not really giving any relief at this stage.
The physio team have given up on any direct treatment as my back goes straight into spasm as soon as they touch it. I am being referred to a pain specialist, so possibly I can get some relief that way. But for the moment I am taking each day as it comes and getting through it the best I can.
The most hurtful thing about this whole accident and subsequent time off recovering has been the response of other people. Once I again I have been put in a position (or rather shoved in this case) which was not of my own making and I have been surprised at the attitude of some people when you mention the word “whiplash”. Whilst nothing has been said directly, you get that familiar feeling as when mentioning Fibromyalgia that you are somehow swinging the lead or exaggerating your injuries, after all it was just a tap in the rear of my car!
My health professionals have been great and very supportive, on the days where the pain has been too much and I have got into their office and had a meltdown, they have reassured me that it is not all in my head and that my pain is very real. They believe that there is the possibility that my Fibromyalgia has exasperated the situation and there is the potential that the acute whiplash could well become chronic.
A few weeks ago, I was referred to an orthopedic consultant to check that there was no damage to my spine. Here I was, once again confronted with a “medical expert” who was not only rude and dismissive of my pain but totally rejected my Fibromyalgia, telling me that he got Fibromyalgia every Monday morning and that basically it was a tag that rheumatologists stuck on someone when they didn’t know what was wrong with them. To say I was shocked and upset was an understatement, to think that really nothing has changed in the 16 years since I got my diagnosis and there are people in his position that still are not upto speed on this condition.
Thankfully my GP and physio are very sympathetic and knowledgeable but his reaction just reinforced why I opt to deal with my Fibromyalgia on my own terms and in my own way. If anything, he has made me more determined to support and empower my fellow Fibro fighters.
I have been keeping myself busy at home, with a lot of reading and online webinars. I am planning on writing a book and have been asked to write for a wellness site which will officially be launched in January – so watch this space.
I also have a couple of additional projects that I am working on but these are still under wraps for the moment. I am planning on revamping this blog slightly so you may see some changes in layout (hopefully to make it easier to navigate) but none of the information will be lost.
This time has been quite productive and it has given me a lot of time to think and reevaluate my life. I have been overwhelmed by the kind response of some and the total lack of compassion expressed by others but hey after 27 years of coping with Fibromyalgia…..why am I suprised.
Enjoy your Sunday.